Production Deployment

“The period approaching a big production deployment is filled with hours of testing boredom interrupted by frantic moments of shear terror when an unsightly issue creeps from the glooming defect abyss.” –Elijah Manor

Spanish Words

"The Spanish language is only the spelling out of English words. For example, if you spell socks (S-O-C-K-S) it means, "That's what it is!". The only reason I can't speak Spanish is that I can't spell to save my life." --Elijah Manor

Free Wifi

"The hunt for local free wifi must be akin to a lion prowling for wildebeest." --Elijah Manor

Summer Day

"After a long hot summer day, a .NET developer jumps into the refreshing AppPool and opens a tonic bottle of iisreset." --Elijah Manor

Bad Memory

"It turns out that I'm not always right. I just have a bad memory." --Elijah Manor

Seat Belt

"Some people think they have the need to buckle their seat belt, but I always say, 'There is nothing like the feeling of flying through the windshield on a brisk spring morning.'" --Elijah Manor

Spare Tire

"If I were made out of rubber, the spare tire around my midsection could rescue you from a horrendous vehicular disaster." --Elijah Manor

Friend

"A friend isn't a friend unless you can depend on him to not pretend his befriendment, otherwise, they are a fiend and should descend to a foreign land." --Elijah Manor

Birthday Cake

"If it was your birthday and you were sitting on the ceiling would it be appropriate to serve upside down cake, or would that be too down to earth?" --Elijah Manor

Office Pranks

"All of my office pranks have raised their ugly heads and attached themselves to my workstation. They have a new leader and his name is Kent." --Elijah Manor